Monday, June 14, 2010

Dear Running

I used to struggle with running because, well it was hard. Running was Hard, it was hard to breath, hard to talk, hard to enjoy one moment of one single step. That was then. This is now…Running you are not hard to do anymore, I can breathe, I can talk and I can really enjoy many of my steps, but why running, why do you have to be so mental? Just when I think I overcame the hard part you have to go all MENTAL on me. Though I know running is mental and have experienced that I realize that sometimes being mental can be the hardest obstacle to overcome. Some people run very well when they are angry, I do not.

A Mental runner who had a hard day!


Wow, running is mental. I got to experience how mental it really is, when I did not want to run at all. Due to some difficult family things going on I had a rough few days. Didn’t eat as much as I usually do, didn’t sleep as well as I do…and I love my sleep. I always like to do my long run on Thursday but this week that was not happening. I had to do it Friday which wasn’t ideal since I had plans Thursday night for dinner which included wine, oh well…I will deal with it. I was really hoping that Friday something would click and I would be roaring to go, but sadly that did not happen. I wanted to think of every excuse not to run but I knew I had to get out there. I had 13 miles to cover and I had 2 weeks before my marathon and there was no way I skip it. Hoping that I would be able to process I didn’t turn on my iPod and I decided it would just be a time for me to talk to God about some things. The first few miles went OK, but after that…I just wanted to quit. To be honest I have never had a day like this. I have endured mental, tough runs, but this was on a whole new level. I just didn’t want to do it. I really think the lack of food and sleep in addition to high emotions was playing into this. I stayed close to home and decided to do 3 loops which I never do but figured I wanted to be on auto pilot with no lights and few cars. I decided that I needed to get to 10 miles and then I would allow myself to stop. I was freaking out and hoping I would not have to deal with this on marathon day. Thinking about how Olympic athletes come to major events and compete just hearing tragic news and they manage to do amazing things, I really wonder how they do that. Those are some SKILLS that I obviously do not possess. I did make it to 10 and just stopped and really didn’t care. I wanted to be done.

June 11, 2010 Stats:
Miles: 10
Pace: 9:52
Time: 1:38
Calories: 1272

I am so thankful for my training and all the ups and downs it brings. It does really prepare you for what’s ahead…the good and the bad.  I hope marathon training will forgive me for missing 3 miles.

I have to end the post on a good note:

Blog spot finally brought back spell check...It's about time!  But that wasn't the good stuff I was talking about.  Tall Mom had a birthday celebration and house warming party on Saturday and I was so excited to celebrate with her and see my fellow bloggy friends. Having local bloggers is so great.  Every blogger loves pictures so I had to share some with you...

You probably saw these on Mels' blog, but I knew she would want to share them....
Pretty running LADIES...Zoe, Amanda, Mel, Kerrie and me.

We are running, running and running...come on Cole, keep up.

Prego beats us...Cole is the one who slowed me down.



marathon training will forgive you for the three miles. you are ready for this race and are going to do great. hope things are turning around. and I really love those pictures, you all crack me up!

Stephanie Nichole said...

Awww early bloggy-running meet up? Jealllous!!! See ya'll in Seattle!!

5 Miles 2 Empty said...

Oh man, SO sorry about your rought few days. I hope everything straightens out for you.

Remember that Olympic ics skater whose mother died like during the Olympics? I can't imagine trying to compete after that but they somehow dig deep and must find some sort of meaning to what they are doing. They must completely find themselves in a world within themselves. Amazing.

I am betting this run will make you stronger. NExt time you struggle mentally you can draw from that and tell yourself you went 10 freaking miles when you wanted to stop at 1, you didn't even want to do it at all! that is will power and mental strength Jill! That last three miles is not going to make a difference, the mental strength you gained is far more important.

Hang in there! You got this! If you need anything let me know!

Mel -Tall Mom on the Run said...

TAPER!! Nuff said..

Hugs buddy it was GREAT to see you...

Julie said...

MAJOR props for even lacing up your running shoes with all that is sounds like you had going on. Not sure I would have made it that far. You are ready to ROCK. Literally. Hope to meet you at the race!!

Kerrie T. said...

Sorry you were having a rough time. :( I bet you are just getting BURNT OUT! You've been running so much to prepare for Seattle. ALMOST THERE! (You know how much I hate that phrase, but it's true.)

ajh said...

Great pics! Sorry for the tough time! You will be great in the marathon!

Heather said...

Sorry for the rough run - they happen! Marathon training will definitely forgive you, and surviving that tough mental run is good brain training.

Johann said...

Don’t worry about the bad run. It’s part of a runner’s life. The 3 miles will definitely not matter come marathon day. Good luck, you’ll feel better soon.
Great pics of all the bloggers!

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